Bathroom Humor

Bathroom Humor

Jan 08

Bathroom HumorHow is your time in the bathroom spent? Do you use your private time to reflect on the meaning of life? Perhaps you take a moment for some deep personal reflection. If you are like most people, then you are likely to find some interesting reading materials lying around the privy. Some of the best reading materials to be found are often in the form of graffiti on public restroom stalls.

Bathroom Jokes & Poetry

Aside from looking to the public stalls for a chuckle, nothing beats a good old-fashioned bathroom joke.

There is a husband who is constantly farting. Not just airy farts, but the kind that could peel the wallpaper. Understandably, his wife is upset and finally one day she says,” Honey, one of these days you are going to fart your guts out.”

The following Sunday, as the wife is cooking a turkey for Sunday dinner, the husband falls asleep in his favorite chair while watching the game. Seeing a grand opportunity for retribution, the wife takes the innards of the turkey and puts them in her husband’s underwear. She then goes back to cooking.

Later that evening, the husband comes to the dinner table with a very frightened look on his face.

“What’s the matter, Honey?” she asks sweetly.

“Well,” he replied, “you were right. I did fart my guts out.”

“What did you do about it?” she asked.

“Well, by God’s grace and these two fingers, I got all of ‘em back up there.”

For those who like one-liners:

Why can’t a single woman fart?

Because they don’t have a**holes until they get married.

While a one-liner often does the trick, sometimes poetry is just as slick.

“It was a Saturday night and the moon was green,

And around the corner came a fart machine,

A fart was left, a scream was heard,

And the moon got killed by a flying turd.”

Conditions Of The Bum

Finally, one can always be humored by conditions of the bum and the situations that arise thereof.

“Teacher asks Little Johnny to use the word ‘definitely’ in a sentence

Little Johnny replies, “Teacher, do farts have lumps in them?”

The Teacher says, “Of course not Johnny,”

To which Johnny replies, “Then I have definitely pooped my pants then…”

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